Welcome, dear reader, to a veritable graveyard of timeless expressions, where each phrase is brought back to life for your amusement and edification. Today’s shovel-ready simile is the morbidly delightful “dead as a doornail.” So what’s the deal with this lifeless yet lively comparison?
Definition: The phrase “dead as a doornail” means unquestionably dead, devoid of life, or completely unresponsive.
Synonyms:
- Deader than a dodo
- Pushing up daisies
- Six feet under
- As lively as a stone
- Checked out permanently
Antonyms:
- Alive and kicking
- Full of beans
- Bursting with energy
Origins and Usage:
“Dead as a doornail” hails from the fourteenth century, with its roots sunk in metal nails that were clinched, hammered dead, finishing their purpose in life with a firm bash. Though the exact origins remain as mysterious as a cat in a closed room, one theory is that the phrase refers to the nail’s journey from active construction element to inert, final fixture, never to be prised loose and reused.
The phrase gained immortal literary legitimacy in 1843, thanks to Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol, where Jacob Marley is as “dead as a doornail.” Dickens himself pondered, unironically, why a doornail, specifically, was the favored moribund object du jour.
Similar Expressions:
- Dead as a mackerel: An especially stinky metaphor drawing from the swift-declining freshness of a mackerel post-expiration.
- Dead as mutton: Making the jump from woolly pasture to culinary finality.
- Dead as a herring: Another piscatorial phrase that underscores fishy expiration.
- Dead as a stone: Invoke the cold permanence and lifelessness typical of nature’s rock-hard artifacts.
Proverbs and Quotes to Ponder:
- “When a man sees that the time has come to be really serious, it’d be good to see a serious man along.” —Jules Verne, in reference to doornails perhaps?
- “Here lies someone who knew how to seize the opportunities that presented themselves.” —Epitaph found on a tombstone, presumably doornail-dead.
Recommended Literature, Songs, and Movies:
-
Books:
- A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
- The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer
- Dead Souls by Nikolai Gogol – probably not about doornails, but who knows?
-
Songs:
- “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” by Bob Dylan - you’ll be thinking of doornails.
- “Dead Man’s Party” by Oingo Boingo – where every doornail has an invitation.
-
Movies:
- The Sixth Sense – where some might say not everyone is as alive as they seem.
- Pushing Daisies – exploring the boundaries of life and doornail-deadness.
- Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – for that final scene of intergalactic doornails.
Quiz Time! Let’s hammer it home:
Thank you for joining this macabrely fascinating tour through the crypt of clichés. As you ponder these timeworn truths, may you encounter each doornail, dead or otherwise, with newfound appreciation. Remember, even the humblest piece of hardware can leave an indelible mark on human expression.
Yours in language and lingering thoughts, Wendy Wordsmith, October 2023
