Welcome, curious wordsmith! Prepare to immerse yourself in a stirring expedition through expressions of worthlessness, where our unworthy cast includes beans, figs, buttons, farthings, and much more! 🌪️
🚫 Not Worth a (Tinker’s) Damn 🕳️
Definition: Worthless. Utterly lacking in value—like an expired coupon or a bottle of cola where the fizz has fled.
Origin and Evolution:
The phrase began its linguistic journey as “a tinker’s curse,” morphing into “a tinker’s dam.” What on Earth is a tinker, you ask? Good question. A tinker was a medieval traveling mender of pots and pans. As part of his job, he might build a temporary wall of dough (a “dam”) to hold molten solder until it hardened. Once set, the dough wall was discarded—hence, “not worth a tinker’s dam.” Over time, creative misspelling turned it into “damn,” and now it commonly skips the “tinker” altogether.
Synonyms and Similar Expressions:
Dive into the world of worthless wonders with these cousins of our headline phrase:
- Not worth a bean: You wouldn’t trade it for a small legume.
- Not worth a fig: Fig Newtons aside.
- Not worth a button: Those ancient lost buttons were useless—likely why they were lost!
- Not worth a (brass) farthing: Even the smallest historical currency.
- Not worth the paper it’s written on: Often ascribed to bad checks and false promises.
- Not worth a pin: Tiny, prickly, and of slight consequence.
- Not worth a plugged nickel: Alas, a debased nineteenth-century coin.
- Not worth the powder to blow it up: Because destruction costs more than the object.
- Not worth a rap: A counterfeit coin from Ireland; forgeries are never in favor.
- Not worth a red cent: Even purely copper cents of yesteryears disapprove.
- Not worth a straw: Because sometimes a plastic one is honestly better.
Humorous Quote:
“If someone says to you, ‘You’re not worth a tinker’s damn,’ consider replying, ‘So you’re admitting I’m at least worth a good @$*!?!# pancake barrier?’” — P. Dunnaword
Proverbs and References:
Keep your literary affections warm with these reflections on value:
- Proverb: “Value is in the eye of the beholder, but a tinker’s damn…well, not so much.”
- Reference: Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray teaches us to value character over superficiality—no “tinker’s damn” given here!
Suggested Readings and More:
- Worthless Words: The Encyclopedia of Linguistic Lowlifes by Les Lexicons
- The Bean Is Not Green: Idioms of Worthlessness by Patti Potpourri
- Mending Fences: Tales of Tinkers and Travails by Harry Potterer
- Songs: “Waste of Paint” by Bright Eyes 🎨, “Money for Nothing” by Dire Straits
- Movies: “Trust” (1990) - Anything but, ironically.
Farewell, ye explorers of linguistic chasms! In our journey through verbal worthlessness, remember: not every hill of beans matters, but the joy of deciphering idioms? Infinitely valuable.
Best Wishes, E. Z. Phrases ✵
